Sense of impending doom, lifted!

May sound a bit overdramatic, but the feeling was also very dramatic.  My sense of impending doom has lifted.  Feel calm and at peace and amazingly free from an expectation of being struck down.  Crazy, huh?

So yesterday went to the OB and they both looked good.  A who is on the right and a smidge lower measured 12 even and B, on the left, measured 11 and 5.  My OB described them as putting on a cirque de soleil show in there as they were waving in sync.  Nice fact about this is they were so active that I was able to feel confident they were both alive at the same time rather than waiting for the second heart flicker. 

Big improvement from last time is the fact that the OB and the perinatologist are calling the same baby A as each other.  Last time, the OB's A was the perinatologist's B and vice versa.  This was even more obvious after we knew genders since they were boy/girl.

Speaking of genders, the perinatologist said that he'll likely be able to tell their genders at my 16 week anatomy scan there.

Today, A measured 12 weeks and 1 day and B measured 11 weeks and 6 days, so both exactly one day bigger than yesterday!

They're up to 5.54 cm and 5.04 cm measured from crown to rump.  He also did a cervical length check, because the tech at my OB's office had gotten a short measurement at 8 weeks.  Both my OB and I thought the tech was just in error, but to be safe, we had them check today.  It was 4.5 cm though, so all is good on that front for now!

The peri did blow my confidence that they were fraternal out of the water.  My theory was that between my previously producing a set of fraternal twins and 8 out of 9 di-di twins being fraternal, seemed pretty likely.  Apparently those stats on 8 out of 9 include IVF and other ART procedures and the percentage of di-di twins that are identical among spontaneous twins is higher.  I still feel they are likely fraternal though.

He seemed much less concerned about any of the causes for concern (multiples pregnancy, short gestational interval, history of preterm delivery, history of fetal demise, conception occurring with an IUD in place) that I'd gotten from the OB.  Seemed pretty laid back even.  Said we would do a little more monitoring and he might be slightly more inclined to pull them early with good biophysical profiles, but that was about it.

Their nuchal translucencies looked good, I think.  They were bigger than I remember the previous three times being, but at 1.8 and 2.3, they are still not in the abnormal range and are just a bit above the 50th percentile.  The blood part adds more info as well. 

And, I forced myself to work through my weird psychological hangup over a place called The Coffee Bean.  On my way to the catastrophic appointment, I had stopped there to get a rooibos latte.  I left it in the car to cool off when I went up for my OB appointment because I was used to them being so quick.  I never saw that drink again.  And somehow I just got a hangup that I couldn't go there.  I figure it's much better than the OB or the perinatologist or the hospital, but I'm not a fan of myself having irrational hangups.  So I decided this morning that I could do it.  And I did!  And it was good. 

It really is odd the degree to which the sense of impending doom has lifted.  Here's to hoping that it doesn't return.  Next OB appointment is in two weeks and then next perinatologist is in four.  Maybe not back to naivete, but cloud of doom definitely dispersed.

And must gain more weight.  Must.  It shall be done, rawr!