Massive Leaps of Faith

This week has included two leaps of faith that dwarf the previous $30 leap of faith.  Not only did we make these leaps of faith, but I actually didn't stress over them too much, which I perhaps think is more impressive.  [There's a question at the end of this that I'd love you to read if you have household employee experience! I'll stick it in big font too since this is such a long post. Pretty, pretty please ;-)]

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First off, we have a nanny in place!  I had previously decided that getting a nanny in place for June 1 would simplify things a fair bit and wouldn't increase our costs too much and would definitely provide a greater chance for the situation to work.  Wanting someone to start June 1, we had been told that we should probably plan to start looking around April 1.  Great plan, right? 

Well, I am still on the forums for my local mothers of multiples (MoMs) group from last time and I get a digest a couple of times a day.  A week ago there was a message titled "Nanny Available in March".  The description was really positive, was specific to our area and seemed to fit what we were looking for.  I had had a friend recommend that talking to a couple nannies in the area could help us finetune our job description, so I decided to go ahead and contact the current employer to get information.  I gave her a little information about what we were looking for and she replied that she thought the nanny would be a great fit as she had previously cared for infant triplets along with a toddler sibling.

I talked to the current employer the next morning and the nanny really did sound like a great fit.  Her current employer thought that she would be good with an April 1 start date and she passed on my information to the nanny, who I am going to call Poppins since I'm not sure about the etiquette here.  The current employer also let me know what she was currently paying which was well below the price point we had expected.  Poppins called me and we talked during nap time of her current job and she sounded fantastic.  We arranged to meet at our hour the next afternoon to talk in more detail and have an initial interview.  Poppins and I discussed that as a compromise since we were shooting for June 1, we would employ her at her current rate until August 1 and then would give her a 20% raise.  Poppins left me with her resume and references.

Here's a brief summary of reasons that I was excited about her and willing to consider moving forward with an earlier start date.  She lives within three miles of us, has experience carrying for infant triplets plus a two-year-old, is organized by nature, I enjoy talking to her, has communication identified as her most important job characteristic, has availability for the hours we want, is within our price point, has great professional and personal recommendations and is already CPR and first aid certified.  In addition, she not only is ok with us doing things by the book, she prefers it!  She went to a year of culinary school and likes to do meal prep for the families she has worked for.  She is willing to do the meal planning for the meals during the day definitely and even dinners if we prefer.  She prefers to have responsibility for the children's clothing and laundry.  She grew up here and definitely has English as her first language, but is also fluent in Spanish.  And she liked the dogs!

Phrases in her reference letters include: ‎"remarkably caring and responsible", "household manager", "effortlessly holds their attention and with more patience than I can and I am their mother", "responsible and reliable", "universally punctual and flexible", "active with them", "initiates own crafts projects"

She didn't blink an eye when I told her that we didn't even have broadcast television either.  And her cell phone number?  The 7 digits that aren't the area code consist of six of the same number and the seventh being a multiple of that digit.  I had it memorized from the first time I dialed it!

Based on this first interview, we decided we did want to try to go ahead and hire her at the earlier April 1 date.  Then I spoke with her current employer and found out that in the week she had been on the market, she had NINE offers on the table.  Poppins had apparently liked us, but it definitely wasn't a shoo-in.  We decided that we didn't want to lose her, so we made two changes to our contract.  First, we made it so she starts on March 19 and second, we have the 20% increased pay beginning from day one.  After these changes, we moved to the top of her list and she was willing to move forward with a contract with us after a meeting of both entire families.  Apparently the fact that we seem like nice and good people and that she likes to be considered more an extension of the family than just an employee is what pushed us to the top.

Last night, we met with her along with her son and her husband at dinner time.  Her son is in kindergarten and a little over a year older than Trajan.  Those two boy shad the best time and really hit it off.  We all got off really well and so we are moving forward!

We decided that since Chiron is paid in daycare through the end of March, we will go ahead and leave him there for this month.  She will therefore be working at the house for two weeks with no kids.  Our plan is that she will use this time to work on the general organization of the house and some of the chaos that has grown since I went in the hospital (yes, a year and a half ago, don't judge).  It will also allow her to meet the maids that we have who come for a few hours every Friday morning without having the kids there.  And she is going to do some counting and measuring to help set us up to move towards babyproofing (wasn't necessary with Trajan, but is so necessary with Chiron).

Then, we will add Chiron at April 1.  We are thinking that we won't add Trajan even for after-school until he gets out for the year at the beginning of June, so her first day with both boys will be June 4.  Then, when the girls get here (see the leap of faith!), we will work them in some as well while both of us are in the house more in the months after they are born and then when Trajan goes back to school and we go back to work full-time in the offices, she will watch the three littles.

All seems great to me, but you can see that pulling Chiron out of daycare, giving an employment contract in which we require at least four weeks notice to terminate and committing to pay a full-time household employee is a very significant leap of faith.
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Second leap of faith is a friend posted the following picture to Facebook on Tuesday:

 Along with the caption "Liz & Chiron at the registration table. (BEAUTIFUL belly).

It was tagged with my name and so it received very quick comments and feedback.  Up until now, I haven't really been discussing the fact that I was pregnant with people that I don't see.  I decided to just go with it and embrace the disclosure/sharing rather than censor or anything.  So, I posted a status that I was pregnant with the twins and soliciting more name thoughts.

Leap of faith!
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And the question:

Since we are starting with a nanny in a little over two weeks, I have to get my household employer stuff in line.  I definitely have worked out the details of FICA, unemployment insurance (state and federal), withholding and the like in terms of the theory.  What I haven't figured out is the best way to implement.  As far as I can tell the options are: do it myself with spreadsheets and tracking, use a software product (nannypay.com and Intuit seem to have one each) or use Breedlove.  It's a tradeoff of confidence, time and money... So, what do you do?  What do you suggest?  And ahhh!!!
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I just realized that working on names counts as a leap of faith too!  While I have also thought in my head that they need names whether living or dead at this point, I really am thinking of them in terms of living, breathing babies as we discuss names!

I may be a genius

So, the logistics of childcare has been on my mind a lot.  Here's the situation we will have next fall: a kindergartner (we are most likely going to take the plunge and move him to the public school for next year), an 18-month-old and hopefully two newborns.

We adore Chiron's daycare.  It is so good that relative to the two places we had Trajan before preschool, I feel almost negligent.  They love and enjoy the kids.  The notes from the director to Chiron's developmental pediatrician plus how they work with him had her declare at his 9-month appointment that we didn't need to add PT or OT.  Their food has been written up by the restaurant critic of the local newspaper.  They have great events and the families really interact and it feels like a community.  Not only that, but so far they have always had a slot for Trajan to go on his school holidays and he enjoys getting dropped off with his brother and also seems to really like the kids and activities for the big guys.  A school with enough outdoor time!

I feel pretty confident that the director would be willing to work with us to negotiate down the price of two newborns and a toddler to under a nanny.  They should be a bit over a thousand each, but I really think she'd make us a package rate.  I started fantasizing about this idea and it seemed great!

Then reality hit.

One, how do you get two newborns and an 18-month old in and out of the school?  I'm guessing a carrier plus a double stroller would work, and probably would work pretty well, but that seems like a lot to do every day just for daycare.  Still, other parents are very helpful and in the morning there is often a second teacher around and this could work.  Ok, maybe we can do this.

Then Chiron got his first fever.  Minor thing, an ear infection, but enough to keep him out of school for two days.  Then it hit me what a cold could mean.  Kid one has it Monday and Tuesday, kid two on Wednesday and Thursday and then kid three on Friday.  An entire week worth of missed work for a cold.

We can't do daycare.

So, a nanny seems like the answer.  There are a lot of logistic to be figured out related to a nanny ranging from finding and hiring one to withholding and social security/unemployment taxes to arranging food in the house for all of them to eat and all the minor details, but I really think it will work for us. I've been convinced by those who have used nannies that as long as we select carefully and hire someone with appropriate experience (pay rate appropriate to that experience) that a nanny should be able to watch Chiron as well as two newborns. 

Here's the part where I think I may be a genius.  Was thinking that we would look for starting sometime around August or September.  Both Paul and I really ate through vacation and sick time with Chiron staying home five months after getting discharged from the NICU, so we frankly just don't have the amount of time that we would like.  So, having someone in place early will better allow us to get some work in and nurse projects along as well as children. 

But hiring someone during that time frame seems stressful for several reasons.  One, having hopefully two additional little people.  Two, knowing that we HAVE to have someone soon.

Thus, the genius.

We should go ahead and try to hire someone to start at the beginning of June! Trajan's school year ends the first couple days of June and we were trying to decide between some camps and putting him at Chiron's daycare, so instead we can just leave him and Chiron at the house with the nanny.  This would allow us to get to the nanny and the nanny to know us, and in particular the big boys, ahead of time.  It also would put another support person in place in case something bad happens again necessitating restrictions and/or the fun of the hospital.

A nanny for these months will be slightly more expensive than leaving the boys both in daycare, but I think the advantages to us will be well worth it.

So, experienced friends of the internet, what do you think?  And if we are looking for June, when should I start contacting people?  The nanny agencies seem insanely expensive.  Was thinking with a mix of telling every person we know that we are looking, advertising with Craigslist and maybe care.com or similar and creating a basic starting application with Google Docs to do some weaning, we could do it ourselves?

Any other nanny logistics, experience or recommendations you can share with us?